Posted by
Susan Bunts on Sunday, December 10, 2006 8:37:26 PM
Lately…I’ve
experienced…in full living color the truth of a Dennis “Pragerism”.
“A bad mood
or negative attitude is equivalent to bad breath or body odor.”
A negative,
critical spirit can be just as offensive and lingering as bad body odor.
An odor can be all pervasive and fill a room within
seconds. Just think of popcorn in the microwave.
Within a matter of seconds the smell drifts throughout the house and soon
you’ll have company coming downstairs to help you polish off that bowl of warm
buttered popcorn.
Or
what about when you’re driving down the highway and that all too familiar smell
of a skunk’s recent encounter with a foe comes drifting into your car.
You can’t roll up the car windows fast enough and it does little good
even if you try because you can’t shut that smell out. That not so
lovely smell is already in the vehicle and permeates the air. You
can’t escape it.
So
too it is with a bad mood or critical, negative attitude. This is
an offence of choice and something that can be controlled if we choose to do
so. Or something that we choose to wallow in and inflict on
others.
I’m
not talking about that occasional bad day that we’ve all had. The
one that starts out from the moment you get out of bed and stub your toe on the
nightstand and follow it with a cold shower…because for some blessed reason the
hot water heater decided to go out that day of all days!. Later
heading out the door and you are short on time…that burnt toast will just have
to do. But the last straw comes when you spill the hot coffee down
that new white blouse. You are tempted to turn that car around and
go home…pull the covers over your head and take the rest of the day off.
Since you don’t have that luxury…you head into the office anyway.
A quick stop in the bathroom helps you to repair your outfit…but that
stop doesn’t do much to repair the stinky attitude you have that
morning.
Now
we’ve all had those “bad day”…and as humans…we need to allow others some leeway
and understanding on a day like that.
The
problem comes in when it’s not just a bad day…but a bad week, month, year,
decade or lifetime. That person is miserable…and they are committed
consciously or unconsciously…to making sure that everyone that comes in their
path knows about it.
When
something good happens to them…they find fault. They pick it
apart…somehow, someway, something was wrong…or it’s just not good enough.
Goodness knows…if a good thing happens to someone else…but not them…they
will be sure to let you know. They don’t know the meaning of
“rejoice with those who are rejoicing”. Instead they are indulging
in their own not so private pity party.
It
comes out in the snide remarks…examining under the microscope every little thing
that comes out of another’s mouth and looking intently to find fault.
It comes out in jealousy that is well disguised in the wrapping of
criticism. It comes in the inability to be thankful or express
gratitude for the good things. It comes in the form of thinking
everyone is better off or has it easier than you do. It comes in
the form of a willful blindness or myopic vision that chooses not to look at or
focus on the blessings that God has provided.
That
glum, negative, critical view is like a cloud that hangs overhead…keeping the
rays of sunshine from breaking through. Not only for that
person…but also those with whom they keep company. They are sharing
the wealth. Gee wiz…thanks for sharing!
It’s
very wearing, draining and tiring. You’re almost afraid to say
anything good because you know that it will be followed by some put down or
negative remark. So instead you choose to remain quite because
there is nothing you can say that will make a difference…nothing you can do to
make it better. Because for these folks…it’s not just a bad day…but
instead the way they view the world and their life.
Make
no mistake…it can be controlled. Think of the husband and wife
having an argument that’s getting a little heated. The phone
rings…and all of a sudden…someone is talking sweet as pie to the person calling
on the phone. If you didn’t hear the quarrel before…you’d never
know there was a problem.
So
too the person with emotional BO can turn it off when they choose too and
instead turn on the charm.
What
they don’t realize is that person sitting across from them…has things pretty
rough in their own life. But they have no idea…because that person
chooses not to continually dwell on it or make sure that everyone in their path
is aware of their misery. Instead they put on a smile and choose to
be thankful for what they do have, focus on others and have a sense of humor
about life.
Always being critical
and negative takes no effort. It’s easy…the path of least
resistance. Sometimes you need to be creative and willing to laugh
at yourself and the world. That can take some work…to see the humor
or find the good in a bad situation. But oh the rewards that await
you.
You
won’t be overwhelmed and pulled down by the difficulties inherent in living when
you keep that sense of humor, look for the good in a situation and praise God
for that which He has done for you.
So
whether you live with the person who emits emotional BO…or have the challenge of
working with them…or encounter them during your daily commute…it’s imperative
that you don’t let they pity party and negative world view cast a shadow over
you.
Instead shine the light
upon them. Shine the light of gratitude and thanksgiving.
Focus the light of humor on a situation…or turn on the high beams of
always looking on the bright side. If nothing else…it may annoy
them. I must say it is rather rewarding when you can deprive
someone of the satisfaction they derive by bring everyone else down.
To quote Martha Stewart…“It’s a good thing!”
When
they want to rain on your parade…raise your umbrella and keep your eyes focused
on that rainbow just across the way. Perhaps they could even use a
prayer two uttered on their behalf.
Life
is too bloody short to be continually focused on the negative. All
you end up doing is multiplying your sorrows and making things worse.
Now why would you want to do that?
P.S…you see even
something good can come out of interacting with a person with emotional BO. It
helped me to write an article…and also see clearly what I don’t want to be like.